Sass.

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Hello. My name is Ace and I am a sassy bitch.

Though I know that, and my friends know that. Strangers don’t.

Which is the problem. Also! Apparently I am twice as more sassy when I get drunk. Whoopdeedooooo.

So Halloween weekend I was the biggest bully ever. And the thing is I am 5’1. I’m tiny. Tiny little me was telling everyone off!!

We were at this house party and yes I told some 6′ foot guy to step aside since I wasn’t talking to him. My roommate brought her friends over and I sassed them all out. I sassed her sassiest friend! I mean how!?

The best part…..I don’t even remember doing ANY of it.

Yup. No recollection what so ever. Great right.

Then to top it all off.

We were at burgerking. you know finishing our night. And these two douchebags walk in and starts telling us how amazing they are. How they earn so much money because they manage multi million dollar companies. Then they go on to talk about the one guy’s traps! TO QUOTE. “I go to the gym and only work on my traps. feel them. they’re huge. no?”

Dude. I’m in like for my fries. Do you really think I’m gonna care about your back muscles. Calm the eff down and walk away.

That was what I was thinking. Throughout the whole thing my friend was sarcastically say “ya. really? that’s so cool.” just to fill in the gaps of this horrendous conversation that NO ONE wanted.

After obviously laughing at them for not realizing that we didn’t care. He proceeded to google his name, which
1. My phone was at 8% so no thanks
2. I am frankly too lazy to get my phone out for some guy’s last name
and 3. AGAIN I DIDN’T CARE ENOUGH

So my response “To be honest I’d rather not.” to which he shoves his phone into my face with his last name googled. Really dude? Reaaalllly?? I legit could not even.

I just told the guy we’re in a line and to turn around and face the right way. And after having my back to him for like 2 mins he leans into my line of sight and asks me if I hate him. Realizing that I may have hurt his feelings a little I turned and told him. “listen, I don’t hate you. I don’t.” I mean I wasn’t gonna apologize. They were announcing to everyone in BK that they were the shit.

So then to which he tells me “no. no. you hate me” to which I ask “do you want me to hate you?”
He nods “ya I do.”
So I say “oh. Okay. then I do. I do hate you”
TO WHICH HE GETS UPSET AGAIN AND TURNS AROUND BITCHING.

i am floored at this point. This guy was worse than a woman being sad while pmsing or something. there was just no winning.

There was this guy close by who heard our conversation and told me i was being to harsh. so i asked him.
“I mean if i told you to sit in a chair and you sat in it AND THEN i bitched at you for sitting in that chair. What would you do?”
he thought about it for a second and nodded. “fair point” he said, agreeing with me. there was just no winning.

So finally. We got our food and dipped as fast as we could from that BK. and then just because I felt bad for being a little bit mean. every person that walked by me even if they were in just in normal clothes I told them they looked great. I was fucking oprah after BK, giving everyone i saw compliments!

ps. the douchebag from BK also grabbed my friends ass. after that point i thought he deserved a little reality check.

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Living.

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For a girl who spent the last four months living with people she didn’t know. Having a random guy be in the kitchen cooking 3 meters away from her room, this little princess was out of her comfort zone.

My last place was a complete mess.

Why?

Because no body gave a rat’s ass about the pig sty we were living in. None of us knew each other, and one girl had the audacity┬áto let her boyfriend stay over every other week. I deliberately picked a place with all girls so that I didn’t have to worry about walking out of the shower to meet in the hall with a guy. Thank you very much.

But finally that is over and I am living with my friends now. And all I can say is that I am so glad to be living with friends. I honestly don’t know how people can live with others that they don’t know. Living alone is a different story but just living with random people I don’t think I can ever do that again; There was a ginger in it’s packaging on the counter top for 4+ weeks sprouting another stem. That’s how many shits were given at my place. And the funny thing is when friends asked to sleep over I told them not to because my place was filthy. No one believed how bad it could be until they took a step inside and saw their white socks turn black.

Alas living with friends isn’t all peaches and cream either. There’s the constant food mix ups, things getting tossed or used that you didn’t know about. Talking for long hours without getting work done, impromptu game/food/drinking/talking night (this sucks when its more than 2 days in a row). Cooking at the same time, and cleaning. Oh and sex too! I haven’t had to bear through it yet, but I know that when the day comes, it’s going to be hell.

But so far for now I am loving coming home to friends, and sharing my time with them. It truly is a second home.

Independence.

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So I just turned 20 a couple weeks ago. And finally living in an actual building with a bathroom I share with only one person. Trust me that’s something to celebrate when one goes to university.

But now, I actually have responsibilities, such as cleaning the kitchen and bathroom, cooking, sweeping! I mean I’ve done it before at home but my mother would still do it again since I’m shit at cleaning (sorry mommy. I try)

But it’s so strange for a someone like me, a girl who comes from a relatively strict family to walk around at 1am coming back from a friends into a building, pressing an elevator button and putting the keys in the door and stepping in. All the actions I see older women do in movies. Never once did I think I would step into a home where my parents weren’t there.

The other day I also stayed over at my friend’s ( a girl from high school) but we both stayed at her older sister’s place. Her sister’s place looks a lot less like an undergraduate’s home, but what a real adult would live in. But just then, when I walked in was when I realized that in 5 years or so, this is where I’d be too. And then another 5 years go by then I’d be 30.

I literally turned 20 two weeks ago and here I am thinking about a decade into the future!

There’s this whole new wave of independence that I feel bittersweet about.

Does anyone else feel like this in the twenties?