Day Two.

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Day 2. What is my middle name and what is its significance.

Well sadly I actually don’t have a middle name, which I find to be extremely upsetting. I always wanted a middle name so that one day if a person I didn’t want to know who I was or basically someone creepy asked me what my name was I could give them my middle name and I technically wouldn’t be lying. It’s like a second identity; makes you feel like you’re in a movie. Or at least I thought so. I figured because neither of my parents had middle names, I thought it was a cultural thing that neither would my cousins would have it. But alas I found that they did, though it wasn’t the best of names I’d say.

This leads me state, why I’m Ace here. Initially my parents were torn on what to name me when I was born. You see, I wasn’t born in my home country like parents, and neither was I born somewhere typically from the millennium generation. So my father wanted to name me more closely to the culture of the country that I was born in, but my mother wanted a name that was more culturally sound to us. So they compromised; I mean I like my name, but when I asked my dad, he told me the potential name that he would’ve named me if he could. And Ace is the short version of that name, I mean if the day comes that I really want a middle name I just might make it so.

Cheers, all you middle-named people.

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Death.

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Just a couple days ago was the death of my father’s boss. Why does it matter?
Because to me, that man was more of a grandfather to me, than the two I already had. And it sucks as one grows up they tend to not visit people as much as they should.

I remember when I was younger I saw him once at least every summer. But was also before I left the city for school and before he continuously fell ill. But you know I could have seen him in the past two years. But bad people and bad timing stalled the whole process.

Even though we slowly drifted apart I was glad that I did call him and talked to him, because the moment my father called me to tell me that his boss has passed, I quickly thought back to the last possible time I talked to him. And then realized that what if…

Just what if that we didn’t end on good terms, It’s already too late. The person is dead, and there is nothing that anyone can do about it now. That other person will leave the world thinking that you were mad at them, or they’re still mad at you.

Aside from that, I have never had any too close to me pass, and I think this may be the first for me. Just the thought of the person is no more doesn’t seem to phase me. Also probably because the idea of that seems ridiculous; until it isn’t.

No regrets…But

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Based on the previous post also being sobered up now. (I also can not believe that I was able to make a full post whilst drunk without any typos either).

But back to the matter at hand. I ended up making out with a guy, no big deal, but, turns out he was the roommate of the guy I genuinely wanted to meet. So there you go, I’ve made a name for myself.

In all honesty, I really don’t care of what others think, nor do I think that making out with someone at a party is even a rumor worthy event. But turns out if two people were to go into a room and make out no one would think of the situation like that.

Which is why I’m kind of glad, for me it happened on a kitchen counter in a corner. Though would have I done it again, no.
I was placed into that position a little because of my inability to say no. I am not blaming the guy, nor myself, but I was pretty tipsy and single plus he was cute, but just a douchebag. But when he did ask “come back to my place” I stayed firm and said no.

I did say yes, to tomorrow, but let’s be real, he wanted to hear it, so I said it. Overall I never realized how hard it was to say a POLITE no. I mean you could smack the guy in the face with the word no and tell them to basically fuck off. But I don’t want to embarrass them either, AT THE SAME TIME, guys get the hint!

We are trying to subtly tell you no, so that neither of us gets embarrassed and have to face that issue for the rest of the party. AND I don’t get this, why  must guys, WHO DON’T EVEN KNOW THE OTHER GUY PERSONALLY still want them to hit homerun with a chick. Like my friend wanted to get me out of that situation but when she tried, a couple guys were like “don’t cockblock them” even though I sent her a “hey, come save me” text.

I’m not sure how the “bro code” works for you guys, but please don’t stop a girl from helping another girl out if that’s what she wants. Because that’s girl code for us.